02 March, 2011


According to Facebook, I have 222 friends. (That may have changed by this writing.)

Isn't that amazing? That's so many people!

Well, I call bullshit. 

I try to communicate with everyone I can on my friends list, and I will comment on their posts or message them, I try to at least make sure I don't miss any major life events. Sometimes I still do, but I try not to. I rarely delete someone or ignore their wall posts, and I have never blocked anyone that wasn't obviously a spammer. 

I consider Facebook to be more a networking tool, and by "networking", I don't mean in my professional life. I think networking can be used for personal stuff, too - so that you can solve problems when they arise, be part of a support group when something goes wrong for other people - it's just good to be there, and have people know you're there. 

At the same time, I kind of hate Facebook, for the obvious emotional reasons. Sometimes, seeing a lot of negative status updates can bring me down, and sometimes, posting negative statuses can bring others down. When someone doesn't friend me back (this happens most with people I know professionally or haven't seen in a long time), or when I find out I've been blocked (especially for unknown reasons). When all of the people I know get together, but don't invite me, sometimes it stings. 

It's fun to keep up with other people's drama, and sometimes I admit it is nice to see that my life is going well in comparison to other people - but it also gives me a window to say hey, are you okay? Can I help you in any way? Is there something I can do that would brighten your day? And I do that sometimes. I can keep in touch with friends, and family, and people from school that I barely know but still kind of want to see how their life is going. I can live vicariously through the people I met in Spain who are legitimately archaeologists, and see the world from my computer, through the eyes of people who I have something in common with.

Work people don't add me much, in either job. A lot of the time, even if they do, they put me on limited profiles or end up defriending me later. I've learned to deal with that. It annoys me a little, though, I will admit. If I don't friend someone, I normally message them to say why, unless it's completely obvious that we don't know each other at all whatsoever (to both parties). I hate limited profiles and when someone puts me on one, my trust of them decreases significantly. When people defriend me over minor kerfuffles or for what appears to be no reason at all, I get annoyed. First, tell me why you're defriending me! Is it a misunderstanding? I'd just like to know! Second, why the hell did you friend me/accept my request in the first place?  

I always feel like Facebook "friendships" are one sided. I try to reciprocate any contact I get, but in spite of 222 friends, I don't get much contact. Even if I'm contacting people through business, I try to ask how they're doing - and I mean it when I ask, I really do. I don't ask how people are doing if I don't care. I always want to hear what is going on. 

Anyway. That's my rant of the day. Hope it didn't bore you too much!


  1. I just had to go figure out how to work facebook to see how many friends I have. 241 on there.

    I don't have time to read facebook anymore. There are too many status updates. Also too many of the people I can't even remember how I knew them. If I made the time one day I'd go through and get rid of them because if I can't remember them, perhaps they can't remember me so why are we friends anyway?

    Some people think if they read your status update that is enough communication with you to know how you are doing and to remain friends. That bugs me. (Same way with people who read my blog but never talk to me anymore in person, phone, email, IM and also never comment on the blog but claim they are keeping in touch. well they know about me because I blog everything but I know nothing about them anymore. annoying.)

    Some people have 800+ friends on facebook. how is that even possible?

  2. I get what you mean. I figure, if they have me on their Friends List, that's their choice. If they don't want to read my status updates they can hide them or whatever. I just like to be able to read theirs.

    I think that status updates can be spurs for discussion, but that you should try to e-mail, message, or call if there is more to it.

  3. I think the work thing is touchy...some people refuse to friend anyone they work with...and some keep it limited to keep lives seperate. I think that if I am going to be on Facebook, I shouldnt be nervous about anything I put up there